do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I need to align my fucking chakras
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
