East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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