ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
