she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
