i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
