i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize