the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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