You're my little dorito
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
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