yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
