Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
