hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
