it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize