I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
