we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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