did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
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I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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