Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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