Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
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Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
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Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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