I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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