I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
