Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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