Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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