how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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