So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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