I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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