YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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