i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
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Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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