I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Lo siento on account of my penis...