It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize