in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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