Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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