Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize