There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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