Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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