Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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