i'm signing you up for texting rehab
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Dignity is for republicans.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize