nut hugger
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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