I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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