Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
we're so committed to being not committed
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
