I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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