Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
