Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
