We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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