Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
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