Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
