Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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