I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
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I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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