Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
now i know why i became what i already was.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
