I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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