just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
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