"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
