wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
