btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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